画美女裸体时 美术生把持得住吗

眼看着高考一步步接近，无论理科生还是文科生，学渣们都陷入复习火葬场，在众多考生中，还有一类经常被误解的人，他们就是

Seeing the college entrance examination approaching step by step, both science students and liberal arts students are trapped in the review crematorium. Among many candidates, there is a kind of people who are often misunderstood. They are

当一个美术生有多苦？你可能听过这样的话

How hard is it to be an art student? You may have heard such words

……今天，朕就带各位爱卿，来了解美术生的日常究竟是怎样的，被美术生逼疯的老师

... today, I'll take you Aiqing to understand what the daily life of art students is like, the teacher who is driven crazy by art students

当美术生的老师，那是需要极高的心理素质，极强的抗压能力，因为你永远不知道，美术生的艺术创造力究竟在什么时候爆发，可能在他们想要表情包的时候

Being a teacher of art students requires high psychological quality and strong pressure resistance, because you never know when the artistic creativity of art students breaks out, maybe when they want expression bags

也有可能他们想来一场行为艺术的时候

Maybe they want to have a performance art

哪里有压迫哪里就有反抗，被罚了也能交出独具一格的作业…

Where there is oppression, there is resistance. If you are punished, you can hand over your unique homework

要是遇到绘画水平，跟整人水平一样出色的学生，他们的降维（三维→二维）操作，能够让你从怀疑什么是真什么是假，到怀疑整个人生，怀疑整个世界——挂钩可以是假的

If you meet students who are as good at painting as the whole person, their dimensionality reduction (three-dimensional → two-dimensional) operation can make you doubt what is true and what is false, to doubt the whole life and the whole world - hook can be false

插座可以是假的

The socket can be fake

颜料可以是假的

Paint can be fake

就连厕所都…

Even the toilet

在画室吃饭还要小心，因为食物饮料…那都可能是画出来的！！

Be careful when eating in the studio, because food and drinks... They may be painted!!

老师喝完的反应，心疼…

The teacher's reaction after drinking, heartache

其他学生打瞌睡，再怎么隐蔽再怎么耍手段，经验丰富的老师都能看出来，而美术生打瞌睡没一双火眼金睛当什么美术老师？？

Experienced teachers can see that other students doze off, no matter how hidden or how to play tricks, while art students doze off without a pair of golden eyes. What art teacher should they be??

被整那么多次，美术老师应该有免疫力了吧？事实证明，不！上课哦，连钟都可以给你画出来，被欺骗的老师别提有多暴怒了…

After being corrected so many times, should art teachers have immunity? It turns out, no! Class Oh, even the clock can be drawn for you. The deceived teacher is not to mention how angry he is

当然，玩笑归玩笑，老师们还是依旧向往美好的师生关系和学生进行像这样的良好互动

Of course, jokes are jokes. Teachers still yearn for a good teacher-student relationship and have such good interaction with students

他们希望能让美术生们练就，一双能看遍所有透视结构，所有颜色的眼睛

They hope to let art students practice a pair of eyes that can see all perspective structures and all colors

只有美术生才懂的痛

Only art students understand the pain

作为美术生，他们肯定忘不了，被名为大卫、 马赛、伏尔泰、高尔基…的石膏像支配的恐惧

As art students, they will never forget the fear of being dominated by plaster statues named David, Marseille, Voltaire, Gorky

可能石膏给人带来的回忆不是那么美好，岛国就做了一部叫《石膏boys》，四个石膏出道作偶像的动画…

Maybe the memories brought by gypsum are not so good. The island country made an animation called gypsum boys. Four gypsum came out as idols

更别提以下场景，简直逼死强迫症

Not to mention the following scenes, it's almost obsessive-compulsive disorder

对于美术生来说白色颜料就是生命，哪个美术生愿意借给你白色颜料，那你们关系一定超级铁，当然，要是你把白颜料这么搞，那基本上，你们的友谊已经结束了

For art students, white pigment is life. If any art student is willing to lend you white pigment, your relationship must be super iron. Of course, if you do this with white pigment, your friendship is basically over

当画作品的时间不够时，美术生的画风就会从，写实派进化到抽象派

When there is not enough time for painting works, the painting style of art students will evolve from realism to abstraction

美术生往往感受着身体各部位，究竟有多“分裂”，看到一幅画或者美好的景物，想要画出来的时候，眼睛：会了，会了，脑子：会了，会了，手：你会了个屁

Art students often feel how "split" each part of the body is. When they see a painting or beautiful scenery and want to draw it, their eyes: Yes, yes, brain: Yes, yes, hands: you can fart

即使完成了，也要接受来自老师毒舌的评改

Even if it is finished, you should accept the comments from the teacher

要说美术生最让人觉得神秘的，那大概就是人体课了，你们爱卿可能以为会是这样的

The most mysterious thing about art students is probably the human body class. You Aiqing may think so

其实，这种场景是不可能的

In fact, this scenario is impossible

还有画着画着，这样的

And painting, painting, like this

最下面的画面是这样的

The bottom picture is like this

看了前一部分，各位爱卿可能觉得只有美术生搞死别人，但其实要“搞死”美术生也那也是很简单的，只要开口对他们说以下其中任意一句话

After reading the previous part, Aiqing may think that only art students kill others, but in fact, it is also very simple to "kill" art students. Just open your mouth and say any of the following words to them

所以各位爱卿要多多包容画画的，100年多前，因为一个老爸&美院没接受一个画手，有个画手就引发了世界大战，他的名字就是

Therefore, Aiqing should be more tolerant of painting. More than 100 years ago, because a father, the Academy of fine arts, did not accept a painter, a painter triggered a world war. His name is

希特勒在《我的奋斗》中提到他不想当公务员，然而他父亲却说“艺术家？不行！只要我还剩下一口气，我决不答应！”再加上被美院拒绝后，他产生了以上的想法，美术生的追求——开挂的“触”的境界

Hitler mentioned in my struggle that he did not want to be a civil servant, but his father said, "artist? No! As long as I have one breath left, I will never agree!" in addition, after being rejected by the Academy of fine arts, he came up with the above ideas, the pursuit of art students - the open "touch" realm

在美术生画手界中，他们把画画炒鸡牛的人，称为“大触”，大触画背景是这样的，第一步

In the field of art students and painters, they call the people who paint fried chicken and cattle "big touch". The background of big touch painting is like this. The first step

第二步

Step 2

第三步完成

The third step is completed

技巧来自佐藤夕子

The skill comes from Saiko Sato

“大触”们充分证明不会武功的画手不是好演员

"Big touch" has fully proved that painters who can't do martial arts are not good actors

李小龙作品，不会分镜的画手不是好导演（姜文除外）

Bruce Lee's works, painters who can't divide the mirror are not good directors (except Jiang Wen)

不会用Excel的画手不是好的艺术家

Painters who can't use Excel are not good artists

快80岁的日本艺术家堀内辰男作品，而“大触”画着画着还可以，发生以下的变化…毕加索16岁画的画

Japanese artist hori neichen, who is almost 80 years old, works, and the "big touch" painting is OK. The following changes have taken place... Picasso's painting at the age of 16

到80岁时，他画的画

By the age of 80, his paintings

毕加索曾说：我花了四年时间画的像拉斐尔一样好，但用尽一生的时间，才能像孩子一样画画，对各种各样的美术生和大触来说，也许更重要的是找到自己的快乐。

Picasso once said: it took me four years to draw as well as Raphael, but I spent my whole life to draw like a child. For all kinds of art students and great contacts, perhaps it is more important to find my own happiness.

其实美术生，并没有大家想象中轻松

In fact, art students are not as relaxed as everyone imagined

也不是成绩不好就选择美术

I don't choose art if my grades are bad

当其他考生埋头复习的时候，美术生跑集训跑考场，几个月就要来返几个城市，并不是别人口中“吃喝玩乐”。他们身上没有最脏，只有更脏

When other candidates immerse themselves in review, art students run training and examination halls. They will come back to several cities in a few months. They are not "eating, drinking and having fun" in the mouth of others. They are not the dirtiest, only dirtier

他们同样也要没日没夜地练习，丝毫不敢休息，腱鞘炎是他们最常得的病冬天，即使手有冻疮，还用冷水洗掉颜料。

They also have to practice day and night and dare not rest at all. Tenosynovitis is their most common disease. In winter, even if their hands have chilblain, they wash off the paint with cold water.

不管你是理科生文科生，还是美术生体育生，朕都要赐你们这张符，希望每个人都能考上大学，成为自己领域里的“大触”！

Whether you are a science student, a liberal arts student, an art student or a sports student, I will give you this sign. I hope everyone can enter the University and become a "big touch" in their field!

本篇素材来源于网络

This material comes from the Internet